Flying Solo

Maternity Leave – Day 47
weight = unknown (still working up the courage)

I pulled myself and the baby out of bed at 6:30am. Today was my husband’s first day back to work and I was nervous. While the hubby got ready, I couldn’t help but think back on everything he had done in the last few weeks, which only reinforced my anxiety. How could I possibly be entrusted to care for this baby on my own? In the blink of an eye a lot had changed in two weeks and I wasn’t feeling confident about my ability to navigate those changes solo.

Sadly, as I held our newborn in my arms and kissed my husband good-bye I couldn’t help but wonder who was getting the better deal. I am sure I will be heartbroken when I eventually have to go back to work. Today, however, the fear of the unknown and a lack of confidence in my mothering abilities made me long for the safety of the office.

2 thoughts on “Flying Solo”

  1. If it makes you feel any better, many of us had those same fears and look, our children are reasonably healthy. We believe in you and you and Ivey are in our thoughts.
    When we chat next I can tell you about all of my irrational neuroses that I’m still getting over.

  2. You are not alone. I remember having the exact same thoughts at first. It can be a little bit nerve-wracking at the beginning, but it gets better.
    You will do great. I am sure Ivey knows that she has a loving and caring mom, and this can do wonders!

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